Banging On

Here’s the latest from his nice “room”, you know, with the padded walls

Our so-called columnist explains how you, yes you, can have a Number One hit. We pay him for this.

Events have taken a strange turn, but events are always strange when our loose screw columnist is in the house

The Lego he’s been ordering lately has got a little out of hand

A kazoo, cool sunglasses and a hard-boiled egg

How do we sum up the last 10 years? “Ask Fats,” someone suggested. We wish we hadn’t…

“Who’s in the magazine this month so I can write about them?” “It’s Delia Derbyshire,” we said. What could possibly go wrong…

He turns up each month waving paper with words on insisting he’s a columnist. We think he might be lost.

A waste of space? Sure, but our errant columnist came in pretty handy when we wanted someone to look after the office hamster while we were on our holidays…

We tried to hide our errant columnist’s blatherings, but looks like you’ve found them anyway. This time he’s got an interesting theory he’d like to tell you about…