Banging On

He asked if he could write “proper stuff”. “You know, about history and that,” he said

We think he might have started having lockdown fever dreams. Get a priest…

Here’s the latest from his nice “room”, you know, with the padded walls

Our so-called columnist explains how you, yes you, can have a Number One hit. We pay him for this.

Events have taken a strange turn, but events are always strange when our loose screw columnist is in the house

The Lego he’s been ordering lately has got a little out of hand

A kazoo, cool sunglasses and a hard-boiled egg

How do we sum up the last 10 years? “Ask Fats,” someone suggested. We wish we hadn’t…

“Who’s in the magazine this month so I can write about them?” “It’s Delia Derbyshire,” we said. What could possibly go wrong…

He turns up each month waving paper with words on insisting he’s a columnist. We think he might be lost.