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Timmy Mallett, Tony the Tiger, Jesus

Our resident columnist Fat Roland remembers the time he met one of the guys from Orbital, his all-time favourite band. Except he doesn't actually remember it because his brain was full of drugs, absinthe and, er, farm animals
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Audio Miner

Like an audio miner, Kris Needs heads off with his hard hat and a big shovel and we eagerly await his return with a bucketful of essential new tuneage… Oh look, he’s back  
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Ask An Imaginary Rabbit

Living the dream, that’s our Fats. He woke up from one the other night where he had a some great ideas about how to land a Number One the easy way. Just like THE KLF. Sort of. Desperation or blind faith, you choose